1-  A People-Pleasing Attitude: When we begin our homeschooling year we need to remember to make each and every decision based on three things.

1- What the Lord wants

2- What our husband wants

3- What we want

Our decisions should never be based on what others around us want or worse, what we think they want. When talking with a homeschooling mom, she confessed that many of the decisions that she made in regards to her homeschool were to please her mom. It stressed her out to do so but she was too afraid that if she did not homeschool a certain way, it would ruin her relationship with her mom.

I am not saying that I am not guilty of people-pleasing as well. When I first started homeschooling, I refused to take my kids to the grocery store during “school” hours out of fear of what people might think or say. I set up a homeschool room with desks, an American flag, white board and yes, a screen and projector. I went over-the-top to assure my friends and family (and myself!) that I was qualified and apt to “teach” my kids in the same manner as a public school teacher. Galatians 1:10 says, “For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ.”

First and foremost, we need to seek the Lord’s will in all of our educational decisions. The way we run our homeschool, the curriculum we choose, the extra-curricular activities and the friends that our children spend time with should all be decisions bathed in prayer. When we are confident in our convictions, the Word of God and the calling God has placed on our life then we can do this fearlessly. Secondly, we need to be in agreement with our husband. Run major decisions and choices by him so there is no head-butting when issues come up throughout the year. If you are both on-board with your child taking flute lessons for character development, then when your child complains two-months in, you both will be able to encourage her to keep on keeping on. If you both have agreed to only allow your son to participate in one sport per year then when he begs dad to join several sport teams, there will be less stress and conflict.

2- Negativity

We need to be our child’s cheerleader. Even when it is hard. We cannot allow our fear of teaching them wrong affect the positive reinforcement we give them. Every child can sense the frustration in our voice and the way we teach them. Often when we hear a child say, “I can’t,” “I’m dumb,” or “I give up,” it is because they feel as though they have let us down. If we expect their best from them and push them to do it, then they will feel comfortable to succeed or fail in your home. If they fail, remain strong. Do not blame yourself but step back, see how you can help them along the way and have them try again. Be sure not to speak negatively about your child with others (your parents, other homeschool moms, etc.) If they overhear you speak about them, it will break their spirit. It is tempting to share with other moms, “Susie struggles with reading too.” Or “Matt just does not understand multiplication!” We may say these things to other parents to help encourage them that they are not alone but it can negatively impact your child if they hear it coming from you.

3- Fear You will have an awesome time with your kids this year if led by the Spirit and not by fear. Romans 8:14-15 says, “For all who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God. For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, “Abba! Father!”

The first few years of homeschooling were definitely fear-led and they did not have to be. This past year, after nine years of homeschooling, I truly feel as though I have truly been able to grasp what I want for our homeschool. This has given me the freedom to be who I believe God wants me to be as a homeschooling mom. I may not have a traditional schedule or way of schooling but that is the way it should be. I should do what is best for my family. We all believe this but so many times we try to mimic other homeschoolers or do what we think a homeschooling home should out of fear. Rather than making our decisions out of fear, prayerfully consider what is best for you and your family and you will have an amazing year!