Slow Down!

The youth director in our church used to head up the annual VBS program. He went all out. The kids loved it. One year the theme was Veggie Tales and he created large cardboard cutouts of all the characters to decorate the fellowship hall. When you walked in the room you were greeted by an array of Veggie Tale related carnival games complete with prizes. The zeal, excitement and the gospel message were all present and captured the attention of the children that attended.

Then, sadly, he unexpectedly died of a brain tumor. He was only forty.

Needless to say, he had big shoes to fill and nobody dared dream of picking VBS back up. After all, it had always been his thing. For years, nobody even attempted. Until I started having kids. I wanted VBS for my kids, certainly it can’t be that hard. Boy, did I bite off more than I could chew. My kids were only four, three and one at the time. Yes, three kids under the age of five- what was I thinking? But, I had to do it, my kids simply had to have the VBS experience! So, I approached the church board, received permission to be the VBS director and I was thrilled. Yes, we did have a great year, many unsaved children attended and several received the Lord into their heart. My kids got the experience but I will also say, it was only for one year. One year. Why? Because I realized that I needed to slow things down. Even though it may have been a seemingly noble cause, the timing was off. My kids were young and needed my undivided attention. For several of the days of the program my one year old was sick. Feverish sick. Nobody I knew could watch her because I had already recruited them for the week’s events. And, my family lives hundreds of miles away. I had to go on with the program as scheduled, with a sick child. Then, when I came home at night throughout our weeklong event, I was too exhausted to prepare dinner and my husband (and family) suffered.

After the week was over my husband looked at me and gently explained that family comes first. Ministry second. He is right. I learned a lot that week that has helped me along the road of life, motherhood, and homeschooling.

When different co-ops, field trips and activities begin to arise, I know better than to jump on all of them. Once my kids were school-aged, I quickly got into a good routine and knew what we could handle. My rule usually was, and still is, only one activity outside the house a week during school hours. This would break up the week from the boring and mundane without being too intrusive. Plus, since I’ve added two more children since then, it would make more sense to stay home and help the children focus on their character building and homemaking skills while I tend to the little ones.

We all know our limits and for some reason, we like to test them. Or think we can stretch them. This only can lead to exhaustion and unrealistic expectations. To the mom who feels like they need to be doing more. Providing more opportunities, doing more, going out more and serving more I would encourage you to see how it is affecting your family. By adding more, is it helping them or hindering them by causing you undue stress? We all know babies thrive on routine and in some way or another so do we. My encouragement to you is this:;slow down, take a long look at all of the extra activities you are doing or want to do and see if in the long run they will help or hurt your family. Look at the hours. Is it a sport that will cut into family dinners for months on end. Maybe just pick one evening sport instead of one every season. Is it a co-op? What does it require of you? How much of your day do you need to sacrifice in order to attend? Can you still fulfill the rest of your obligations and stay sane?

Your family is important and finding the balance that works best for your family might not be the same as your friends, and that is okay. Focus on your family and in the end, they will thank you!