When I was growing up, we rarely watched TV. The one day we were allowed to watch for a longer period of time was Saturdays. Those cartoons were life when I was 10 years old. There were not very many video games or computer games. We didn’t even have a computer until I was in high school and it didn’t have internet. I didn’t get a cell phone until I was almost 20 years old. I just didn’t need it.
Times have definitely changed and I am okay with that. We live in a technology driven world where everything is digital and computerized. I don’t want my children to grow up not having had some experience with tablets, computers, video games, and cell phones. But, I also don’t want them to be dependent on them as I’ve seen many young people lately.
I won’t really touch on cell phone usage because my children are way too young to have one just yet. They won’t get their own cell phones until they are old enough to pay the bill themselves and are driving on their own (not while driving!). It’s just the rule we’ve set in place. We never allow our children to be with people we don’t trust 100% so there is no reason for them to need one.
For all other devices there are certain criteria they have to meet in order to earn screen time in our home. Devices include Kindles (my children each have their own with parental controls and no internet), TV, and video games (very old school like Atari and Super Mario). We also don’t allow video games during the week as it becomes a huge distraction and my boys become obsessed with it. We just made this rule so we are adjusting to it.
How to earn screen time:
- School work complete- they must complete their school work before using devices. The only exception to this is first thing in the morning. I don’t get out of bed until 7:30 but my boys wake up at 7am on the dot. I allow them to watch a 30 minute show while I stay in bed. As soon as I wake up, we eat breakfast and the TV goes off until later.
- Chores complete- I don’t ask much from my children but they each have their own set of chores that need to be done each day. That may include making their beds, feeding/walking the dog, picking up shoes, vacuuming, clearing a table from things left behind, etc. They know what’s expected of them and they know to do these things before even attempting to ask about electronics.
- Good behavior- this one is tough some days for my boys. They have bad days sometimes and no matter how much of their school work and chores they get done, if their attitude is atrocious, they do not get screen time. Having a good attitude while doing chores and school work is better (to me) than doing the actual tasks. I want them to be a good example for others. This part of the criteria has gotten them a few times and it is hard even for me because I see the disappointment. But, I have to press on and stay firm.
- Doing above and beyond what is asked of them- I am always watching and listening to my boys. If I see one of them being extra helpful without me asking them to be or if I see them playing with their little brother and keeping him happy, they can earn screen time without even knowing it. These are the times that I praise them and give them lots of encouragement. They love when I surprise them with screen time and they didn’t even know they did anything special. It’s so sweet!
No matter how you do screen time in your home, it’s inevitable that children these days will need some experience with electronics. Our culture is very digitally driven and I want my children to be able to have self control and to be knowledgeable as well. When I start to notice attitudes flying around and bad behavior, I look at how much screen time they’ve had. Usually that’s the culprit and we cut back a bit. I have definitely seen an improvement since implementing these rules for screen time. I hope you can glean something from these suggestions that my family uses.