Actually, the title of this article was going to be, “The Day I Let My Daughter Keep a Toad… In The Kitchen,” because that is where it ended up. For a little while anyway. Keeping random wildlife captive has never been unusual in our home, primarily because my first two kids were boys. And we live on a farm. And, my husband encourages such activities. Me, on the other hand, had to outgrow my prissy, suburban girl ways and get on board with this new kind of lifestyle, and fast. Homeschooling will do that do you. It will make you keep things in your fridge that you had only ever seen as roadkill in the past or make you accept the fact that random finds in the woods and backyard actually constitute a homeschool lesson or at least a YouTube break to learn a bit more about something that others might normally deem as trash.
My, how we can change.
One piece of advice, in my early years of parenting, changed it all. When my husband and I took a parenting course at our church one statement was made by the speaker that has stuck with me over the years.
“Do not clean off that pet rock, sticks or other outdoor treasures that your child brings in and keeps on his dresser. Let him, be a kid.” At first that comment made my blood boil. I have a tendency to be a neat freak at times so any chance I had I would go into my boy’s room and clean, clean, clean. Even if it meant tossing the awkward acorn collection or random rocks that were piling up on their dressers. Until I heard the speaker explain how these finds are important to them and just because they might not have any value to you, they have value to them.
It took me a bit to get used to it but I started respecting their space instead of demanding that I take control of it. Sure, they are responsible for keeping their dressers and rooms clean and organized and they have to learn how to get rid of certain things when they want to bring new things in but all and all this has been a lesson in letting kids be kids. Letting them have fun in nature and bringing bits and pieces of it home to treasure or share with one another. Feathers, bird nests, old snake skins, you name it!
Enter, their younger sister. What do I do? Do I train her to be as prissy as I was as a kid or do I let her get her hands dirty right along with her older brothers. Fortunately, I chose the latter. This has been both a blessing and a frustration. A blessing because she loves to find productive activities to do outside such as picking piles and piles of blackberries to share with the family. A frustration because now I have to remind her to feed the frog that faithfully stares at my while I’m dicing tomatoes. Now that I am committed to allowing them to enjoy nature both indoors and out I am honestly becoming more at peace with it. It has helped me understand more how their little minds work and how it helps them to learn and grow. If you think about it, many formal school classrooms have caged pets or fish tanks set up to help aid them in the teaching process, why not allow it in your home? I certainly do not regret it, my daughter has a deep love for science and the scientific process because of it.
