Well, here I am: a blessed mama of 8 children, 3 of which are teenagers: ages 19, 17, and almost 15. Sometimes, I can hardly believe they’ve grown up so much. This was my first trio of children; they ushered me into motherhood, and mothering them has taught me so much.
It seems that when we search for parenting tips, advice, and experiences, we are flooded with information about infancy, toddlers and little children. What about teens and young adults? We don’t stop being parents just because our children get older, right? We as parents still need encouragement in these stages of our children’s lives, too.
Well, I will tell you my two biggest teen secrets I know so far:
• Consistent parenting should still be a thing in the teen years.
• Just because the world tells you that teenagers are horrible people, does not mean it has to be so.
Consistent Parenting
So, teens are not an experiment of humanity, to be left alone to their own whims and wishes without any guidance. I see no place in God’s Word where we as parents are to take on the ways of the culture and just let our teens do any and everything, simply because they are teens.
We are to still teach, guide, and admonish our teens. We still need to set boundaries based upon their level of maturity and abilities. That means we will have to allow them to take on things that may make us nervous (like learning to drive or taking a college course). But, that also means that we will have to firmly say no, as often as necessary, in order to guide our teens in the way of the LORD.
This concept really isn’t all that different from when we are raising young children. Yes, the ages and circumstances definitely do change, but the principles remain the same.
Teens Are NOT Horrible
Somewhere along the way, our culture just naturally expects teens to be awful, disrespectful people. Teens do not behave terribly simply because they are teenagers. If we’re really honest, the road to terrible for any of us starts long before the teenage years. Many of the terrible things that teens are tempted by can be avoided if the groundwork is laid in the early formative years, and if parents stay the course when the teen years begin.
We must guard our children’s hearts and their influences: who they are allowed to spend time with, what they are allowed to watch, where they are allowed to go. Parents must do the diligent work of reflection, asking the hard questions, and implementing change as necessary in order to keep our teens on the right path.
I must say, my own teens are not perfect, but they are truly enjoyable. I love them dearly and we have quite a bit of fun together. Although I never lose sight of the fact that I am still in the process of rearing them, I still enjoy their “older” company, conversations and sense of humor. It is a sweet process to walk them through adult responsibilities. Just this month, we’ve had final driving lessons, jury duty and field work experience on the schedule for our teens. A lot of excitement surrounds us as our teens gain new experiences. What a blessing it is to walk alongside them, and continue to speak wisdom and the promises of God over their lives. Stick close to your teens; they need you!
Do you have teenagers? What do you enjoy about raising teens? What encouragement can you share with other moms of teens?