Congratulations! Your child just turned 18. Now your job is done, right?
Unfortunately, not. When the clock strikes midnight, and your child is officially an adult, will he suddenly be able to fend for himself? Will he then be more responsible? Will he be more ready for a relationship? Does all this stuff just magically happen because a particular date on the calendar is reached? Even though, in the sight of the law, your 18-year-old is an adult, your role as a parent isn’t finished.
As my children reach this milestone, there are some tears and also much excitement. Hey! This one made it to adulthood! I realize they are now adults in the eyes of the world, and now my relationship with them moves on to the next phase, mentoring!
As you transition from parenting a teen to an adult, you must remember that you cannot treat an adult the same way you do a child. So, it goes without saying you cannot parent an adult as you would a child. You change from the role of parent to that of a mentor. Mentorship requires you to trust the foundation you’ve built into your child and allow them to make their own decisions. And allowing them to be subject to the consequences, good or bad, of those decisions. Your job is to encourage, speak life, and offer advice only as requested. This is the time to love your child unconditionally and use your words to God in prayer!
On the eve of their child’s birth, many parents look into the future and envision the day of their newborn becoming an adult. Some gaze with delight and some with trepidation. Though legally, childrearing ends at age 18, our job as parents is not. Embrace this transition and trust you have done well, building a foundation for your new adult to stand firm upon.
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